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Mom Out: Yes, You Can Take Holiday Without Your Family
Note: This is a repost of the original blog published on another site in 2016. I am just returning from a 3 day solo reboot, so felt it was still relevant. I hope you enjoy the read!
I did.
More than I would like to admit. In fact, full disclosure, this was a hard blog for me to write because it made me face reality and to be honest with myself and with you.
When I was in my 20’s, I hated being alone. I would go to all costs to always ensure that I found someone to share all my activities with: from going for a coffee to snowboarding or mountain biking. I thrived on the social interaction and although I still do to this day, things have changed.
Fast forward a few years: married with 2 young kids and I found myself often dreaming of peace, solitude and a seemingly unattainable balance to my life.
At this point, I would classify myself more as: Burnt Out. Stressed Out. Maxed Out
Anyone know what I mean?
As women we have gained so many rights and we love our jobs and the feeling that it gives us to be successful working moms, professionals and entrepreneurs. But the juggle of being a mom, income earner, house-keeper and cook while trying to maintain any sense of personal well-being balance can be overwhelming at the best of times.
We all think the other women in our lives have it all together. My sister-in-law bakes cakes that blow my mind every time, my daughter’s little friend at school receives apples cut like chess sets and my good friend is a hard working lawyer and yet still manages to create homemade princess wigs for her daughter. You know, the stuff that makes Pinterest so good.
How do they do it?
Well, I recently hit my limit. It was becoming too much and I hated the person I had become. A nag with high expectations. Little sleep for multiple years left me short with my spouse and kids and unable to problem solve like before. I couldn’t make a decision to save my life. Regular daily functions like grocery shopping and being on time were even overwhelming. I became slow and inefficient (even though I was moving fast) and daily life just seemed harder than it should be.
My oldest child reminded regularly how I was “the worst mom ever” having forgotten to put a fruit bar in her lunch or not buy new clothes as she didn’t like the ones she had. As much as I knew this was all ridiculous, there is nothing like a little guilt to throw into the mix.
Little and big things would hit me where it hurts. My confidence, my self-worth, my strength. It was hard not to cry at something daily.
In my eyes, I was a FAILING.
Failing at being a good mom. Failing at being a supportive and loving spouse. Failing at being innovative and forward thinking with my clients.
That may not have been how others saw it, but that is how my completely exhausted, thoroughly spent brain saw it. And it need to CHANGE.
Sure, I had times like these before. I knew I would get through it and I knew I would get up again, because that is what moms do. They GET UP.
So, get up I did. But this time with a renewed spirit. A strength that I knew was inside me but that had long-time been suppressed. I did something that I feel that maybe I should have done sooner.
I took my own advice that is printed right on the back of my business card. "Stop waiting for something to happen. Go out and Make something happen."
I knew what I needed for MYSELF.
I needed to step out and let someone step in for a beat. Time to catch my breath. To rejuvenate and regenerate. I mean, after all, doesn’t everything have seasons of refreshing in some sense. Leaves die to make way for new buds, snakes shed their skins, even computers need to be turned off and rebooted sometimes.
I proposed the Unthinkable. I asked for the world. I suggested taking a holiday.
ALONE.
Now, I know from previous experience that my family leaving me for a weekend alone at home leads to me impeccably cleaning the house and accomplishing any undone tasks before feeling remotely relaxed. So, I knew I needed to be AWAY.
And for me, the thing that centers me the most is kiteboarding. More specifically, kiteboarding somewhere hot.
So, 2 plane rides, a 2 hour bus shuttle and 20 minutes by boat taxi and I write to you from Isla Holbox, Mexico.
Even though I miss my kids and husband enormously, I know they are safe and in the hands of a wonderful and capable man who is providing priceless daddy-time to them. This opportunity is allowing him to parent his way, after all, as one of my friends mentioned, “they are his children too”. In addition, the kids are also in the company of a very understanding grand-mother who knows first-hand what it’s like to be a mom and who agreed wholeheartedly that a break would be beneficial for my entire family. To those two amazing souls, I am forever grateful.
I have been here for a few days and relaxation has started to kick-in. I feel amazing – loving my mom holiday.
mom holiday
It has given me the chance to reflect.
Having been in the fitness industry for many years, I know that we put an incredible emphasis on exercise and nutrition, but we often neglect the third cornerstone of a healthy lifestyle, regeneration. Media constantly bombards us with ‘to-do solutions’ to better ourselves. As good as some of that advice is, sometimes, it is in the doing less that we actually find solutions. When we absolutely stop, it is so much easier to see a clear picture and make clearer decisions. Like looking at a city layout from a rooftop as opposed to wandering aimlessly through the streets with no map.
What about completely stopping once and a while?
Those who meditate daily (and I mean really take time to uber chill and meditate daily) are some of the happiest and most relaxed people I know. They also do not try to accomplish 6000 things a day. Right, note to self*.
So here I am. Stopping and regenerating. Writing a blog and feeling fortunate for the opportunity to work on the Online Fitness Training business I have been trying to build and devote more time to for months.
Moms and dads, my advice to you is to ‘stay strong’ and go out and make things happen. It is my utmost hope that you will seize and create opportunities for yourself as a person and as a parent.
'Own your Strong' in fitness and in life and be a role model for those amazing beings that you have the blessing to inspire and shape.
Surround yourself with people who will support you and do not be afraid to ask.
I did and I am sure glad of that.
For more information on my amazing trip, check out my blog on Isla Holbox.
Follow me for more adventures on Instagram, Facebook, and Youtube or Train with me Online.
Kitesurfing in Isla Holbox: A True Holiday for Non-Kiters and Kids as Well.
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El Zonte: Surf, Sunsets and Living the Dream
Buddy Up! The Partner Band Workout
Throwback to the ultimate trip to the Yukon in 2018 with the family!
The Most Overworked Muscles that (Almost) Every Skier Forgets About
Your Holiday Season Fitness Gift Guide
These no-bake energy balls are one of my favourite on-the-go snacks. Quick, easy and everyone loves them! They store well in the freezer, so go ahead and make lots! INGREDIENTS: 1 cup pecans 1 cup of almonds 3 cups MEDJOOL dates 2 TBSP cocoa 2 TBS cinnamon or carob powder DIRECTIONS 1. Soak the dates in hot water. Drain, but save the date water in the event more moisture is needed later. 2. In a food processor, process the nuts and dry ingredients, then add the dates. If a bit of moisture is needed, use the saved date soak water. 3. Scoop out with a spoon and form balls in your hands or use a mini ice-cream scooper. 4. Roll them in unsweetened coconut, cocoa or cinnamon. Or try rolling them in all 3 together! You can use whatever variation of nuts you want. Stick to only one type if it is easier. You can also make non chocolate ones with a bit of fresh lemon juice and a bit of grated lemon rind or oranges. Once you get the base down you can really play around with them. Time Saver: If you don’t feel like rolling them, you can flatten them into a pan to make bars, freeze for 20 minutes minimum, cut into bars. Store them in your freezer. I would love to hear about what type of variations you make! Comment below.
Meet Chris Sea. Pediatician ICU nurse, pole choreographer, dance instructor and new mommy.
Six-pack abs do not mean that you have good stabilizing technique or a ‘functional core’. They simply mean that you have trained the outer musculature and it holds tone. The inner core covers all the muscles in the abdominal area that are responsible for functional strength and stabilizing. Follow these simple steps to build strength and stability in your pelvis from the base up. 1. Breathe Properly Many of us have poor breathing patterns that we aren’t even aware of. It’s important to make sure you are breathing correctly. Did you know your breathing is a great indicator of how well your core muscles work? Let’s check your breathing right now with a simple exercise. Correct Breathing Exercise While sitting or lying down place one hand over your chest and the other hand over your belly. Take a deep breath in. If you felt your top hand primarily rise, this indicates a shallow breathing pattern (upper chest breather). This is a possible indicator that your diaphragmatic muscles may not be actively stabilizing your torso as they should. Instead, your lower hand should rise and fall evenly as well as your rib cage expand to the sides and into the floor. Practice: 2-3 times per day for 2 minutes.